Book in progress takes odd turn...
How a queer witch author started writing a novel about Jesus
I am on reasonably good terms with Jesus and most other gods that people believe in. It’s part of my (Wiccan) faith to respect the religious beliefs of others. As a good polytheist I believe it’s possible for more than one god to be real and valid and worthy of respect, even if those gods are not the ones I follow.
I’ve been walking a labyrinth located within an Anglican church for about 30 years. At one point at one long 10-year stretch of time, I walked it every week religiously. It’s a form of walking meditation, and I use my time there to centre myself, meditate and pray in my own way.
I am not a Christian, but when you are hanging out a lot in somebody else’s house, it’s important to be respectful. I’ve even stopped in to the church sanctuary after my walk at times and had a little chat with Jesus. He seems friendly.
In my Wiccan practice I am dedicated to a goddess of love. I am told Jesus is also a deity of love. With all of this in tow, I should have perhaps not have been surprized when my latest book took an odd turn recently.
My latest book was supposed to be a light comedy about the removal of hostile ghosts through a supernatural law enforcement agency, set in Vancouver. Because the book is about metaphysical law enforcement, my maverick main character, Smitty, needed to go back to bullpen, hang with her colleagues and get called into the Captain’s office. It is from here that things got a bit wild.
Many authors will tell you that if you are doing it right, characters will take on a life of their own. This has certainly been my experience in other works, and is one of my favourite things about writing. I soon discover that Smitty has a coworker who is an angel, and a captain who appears to be, well, who would outrank an angel, really?
From there, Jesus, or as his character is named in the book, Joshua, Josh to his friends, inserted himself into this book.
No one was more surprized than me.
Most Wiccans will tell you that when gods want to get your attention, they do. This one got my attention with an image in my mind. The image was of a kind of boat made of wood. The boat had all different kinds of wood melded together with cracks in between and light flowing through. The guy from Nazareth was hanging out in the middle of the vessel, drawing threads of light through all the cracks, and earnestly trying to pull the ‘fish’ into his boat.
I told one of my close friends, Kat, about this image and how odd I found it odd to have seen such a vivid, and overtly Christian, image in my work. When I described the image to her a few weeks ago, she told me there was an artwork in a building near where she works that was virtually the same image. She and I went immediately to the building where this public art was. The building was closed.
We looked in through the window and saw a large wooden art piece of a wooden boat high up and distant in a tall glass atrium. I could see it had cracks to let the light in. It was a nice moment to share with Kat, who is a big supporter of my writing. I took it as a sign I was on the right track. I took some pictures, and mostly forgot about it.
Last week, I went in for some minor day surgery. When I walked out after the surgery I had an impulse to cross the lobby of the floor I was on to the other side which looked out onto a glass atrium. The building was on a corner, so I had approached it from a different direction when I entered. I hadn’t realized when I was that this was the same building that that art piece was in. I was inside the building, a few floors up. The piece was closer to eye level here. It felt like a miracle. It felt like a sign. It felt like the Divine reaching out.
My book in progress was supposed to be a romance. It was supposed to be light. But this is the time of year where there is light in the midst of darkness. And this is also a time in history where there is a lot of darkness and a lot of wondering what it all means.
I have a theory about Jesus. I probably have no right to have a theory about Jesus because, well, I’m not a Christian. But having walked in Jesus’s house for almost three decades feeling peaceful and meditating and opening to the Divine, I have come to some ideas that I believe have some influence from my time in his home, if not his touch.
I’ve noticed that many people who claim to believe devoutly in Jesus are homophobic, racist, intolerant and subscribe to other forms of bigotry. They may be sexist, misogynist or unhelpful. However, other Christians are good kind people who help others and who love unconditionally. So I wondered what kind of a god would choose, such followers, in a religious structure that often embodies harm.
I thought again about how Jesus is a god of sacrifice. He is the original guy who takes one for the team. So here is my theory - I think this is what he’s doing in being the god of both the bigots and the compassionate. He is attracting to him folks with some very narrow and hateful views and loving them anyways in hopes or intention that they will change heart and come to love.
This transformation, has become a major theme in my book. It has turned into a story not of people striving for the Divine, but of the Divine striving for people, hoping they will accept limitless love without conditions, while equally respecting their free will.
I have been challenged to wonder not only what would change if we had the courage to accept divine unconditional love even amidst our shame, but to wonder what kind of character arc an omniscient being could have. I mean if someone is already perfect, what way could they change over the course of a novel? I’m discovering that.
Gods, I love being a writer! I love being immersed in mystery and love and finding the story within it.